Mother's Day For Some

 

Mother’s Day for some is just another day…a day that does not have any significance whatsoever. For some it has the same effect as Christmas Day does for a Jehovah’s Witness: not respected…unacknowledged. The day no matter what date it falls on in spring’s most pollen-heavy month carries no emotional connotation or feelings of gratitude for some. Surprisingly, for some men and women Mother’s Day is the most inconsequential day of the 365 days.

When I became aware of this, when I discovered that a number of mothers are not praised on Mother’s Day, when I witnessed this disturbing attitude primarily from females - and then finally believing that this disposition is a reality I still had difficulty understanding that someone’s Mother’s Day sentiment was completely different from my romanticized feelings of the day Mothers are to be recognized for not only birthing and rearing children – but for the vast sacrifices that are made to be a Mom. Right?

My experience with Mother’s Day and my devoted connection to my mother conjure thoughts of appreciation, honor and respect. My mother is the best mom! I am certain thousands have the same opinion of their mother. So, I am in good company…I am amongst a large group that anticipates Mother’s Day. Thankfully, I am not in the midst of too many unfortunates who harbor unpleasant thoughts of a MMIA, Mother Missing in Action. Actually, how does MMIA become a truth? 

Sadly, over the years I have been associated with women who don’t know their mother: “I have no idea who she is…I have never met her.” Regrettably, I have been involved with women who have not spoken to their mother for a while: “I am not sure when the last time I spoke to her. It may have been 3 years now. Not sure. Doesn’t matter anyway.” 

Unfortunately, I have unknowingly been in serious relationship with women who later informed me that their mother abandoned them when they were a child: “One morning my siblings and I woke-up to no mother. She left us for about a year on two different occasions.” Disappointingly, I have been by default an unlicensed counselor for several women who have horrible mother to daughter communications: “I don’t like to talk to her…we are estranged.” 

In all the relationships described above there was/is significant conflict; that's apparent. There were also serious complications between the females and myself. Needless to say, the dealings…connections were severed once I was informed by the female that her mother to daughter…parent to child association was in a deflated state or was non-existence. I eventually bounced…left the relationship with this thought process in mind:

Any girl/woman who has a volatile relationship with her mother is not a good match for me or any man who has a good relationship with his mother. This female has serious issues…she’s damaged. 

What was I to think/believe considering my mother and I have evolved from parent to child to confidants? Without fail or delay, we talk every morning! Of course, we had our share of conflicts when I was of middle and high school age. That was to be expected. But, there was nothing beyond this type of hormonal-laden tiffs…I bucked-up at mom occasionally, and then coward-down repeatedly when she slapped me across my big head. It was that simple. Nothing more, nothing less. She’s my mother! 

Who in their right mind curses…disrespects…demeans…embarrasses…talks down to their mother? I cannot comprehend this modus operandi. What I do know is that there has to be some form of healing. Forgiveness must be considered, and later put into practice. There has to be a meeting…a series of conversations that project genuineness. Then mom has to be acknowledged as the Giver of Life. 

Besides, who wants to leave this earth without rekindling, reconciling with Mom? 

If you are the child without warm thoughts of mom on this glorious Mother’s Day you are not at peace. No matter the situation…no matter what was said in argument…regardless of your discontent with mom you need to be healed. Take the first step. Be not one of the For Some. 

Trying to Touch